I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
