I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize