i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize