Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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