I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
