I met the friendliest cop last night
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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