All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
