I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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