i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
