I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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