I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
