Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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