Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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