well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
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Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
This is classic penis vs brain.
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A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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