piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
