cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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