I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
