brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
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