Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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