Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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