i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
