they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
