We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
