im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
