with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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