Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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