At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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