lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
