is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
