I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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