Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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