I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Vodka?
Forever.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
