Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
