I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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