Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
