Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
