Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
