I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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