this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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