i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize