so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
