i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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