Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
