So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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