No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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