the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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