life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Randomize
