Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Randomize