Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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