I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
