So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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