Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
