butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Randomize
